Nothing HOLDS ME DOWN!! for to long haha
Feb 8, 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5U5tKapZ16c

good morning and welcome to what's here
we on Thursday Thursday yeah we're on
Thursday Wow I am pull you up mighty
close but I put on my mah mah leeks eggs
blistex ballistics and it is on the
ground now um I wanted to show you guys
really quick before I go any further
okay remember these pants okay these are
the ones that accidentally got into my
bag it really was on accident I don't
know why I did this how they got put
into my bag on accident because of
miscommunication between me and my oh
well anyways we went to go and turn them
in and then all it was like do you like
him and I'm like well I like him but I
mean for 17 dollars you know it's
they're more expensive than the other
ones anyways he was like well I really
like them and I like the color he's like
why don't you just keep him and we'll
pay for him I'm like no and so by the
end of it he talked me in he just had to
talk me into it um to keep be numb and
then we just paid for him so that's why
I'm wearing him now
um let's see
I just got out of the shower I'm
debating going live for a little bit oh
no I don't know if I'm gonna go live
today or not but just so we can all
chitchat for a little bit it'd be kind
of nice but I don't know how that will
work because Olly is gonna be leaving
here pretty soon and I think he has
anyways he said he was going to and I
don't know if I guess are gonna let me
um question for any of my fellow
youtubers that might be able to help me
so I am trying to figure out some
information on my
adsense acount through google and my
money because it's saying one thing and
it's doing another it's not letting me
pull up any of my information my studio
my youtube studio is not working right
now nothing is working on my channel I
can access it through my mobile but it's
not all the same stuff so I'm having a
really hard time so if anybody has any
information about Adsense accounts what
my might be doing wrong let me know
because I would love to kind of figure
this all out but anyways give me a few
minutes and I will check back in with
you oh my gosh you guys I just got off
my life with you all that was so much
fun oh I don't know why I don't do it
more often because it is so enjoyable
like I don't even know how to describe
the amount of fun that I have from you
guys like you're all so amazing excuse
the fact that I'm like throwing dust I'm
trying to find because as most you guys
seen only come flying in here while I
was on my life and he went like moved
all my stuff around no I don't know
where half of its at anyways I will find
it but I'm so excited that I just got
off of alive that was too much that was
just way too much fun I hope you all
really truly enjoyed it as much as I did
I I sincerely think that this is
something I'm gonna do more often I
truly truly enjoyed it I really did and
I think that it's something that we
could definitely do more often and that
way it's just like you know
I get to know you guys you guys get to
know more about me and my family and all
he gets to interact and that's so much
fun
you know and it doesn't always have to
be so always like dad's serious all the
time you know it's just I don't know who
my family's trying to bake me out of my
house oh when I was on why I was like
tires a hater up I'm freezing now I'm
like um we got mail time but I'm not
having my kids in here because I did
open one of the packages I did open it
um I got it yesterday so I opened it and
it's definitely a gift for homework but
this gift comes from Jennifer Armstrong
so Jen its life by Jen if you're not
aware of who Jennifer Armstrong is she's
an amazing woman
she's got an amazing channel it is
called life bye Jen if you haven't heard
of it or if you haven't subbed to it go
check her out she's a sweetheart with
Buzz and Woody he is gonna be in Toy
Story heaven then she got this little
book I put on there because he's really
into like like looking at different
pictures and stuff so this is what's
different and you would think that it
would be too young for him but honestly
between the two of us like me and always
sitting down we can read him the story
and then he can look and see what things
are different and what's the same so
it's just like teaching them different
things so thank you
but again like I said I'm not having
them open these things until um and then
I'm still saving all my little goodies
um and then I've got a box over here so
I'm gonna open the box up but I'm gonna
do it quietly because I don't know
what's going on like I know I know I'm
going on so we got some Elaine thank you
so much thank you thank you
it says hi Amy I wanted to thank you for
your channel I love your videos and how
funny inspiring you are I feel like I am
a part of your family hope you all enjoy
the gifts from your friend Elaine thank
you so much I appreciate it
you are so sweet thank you thank you
thank you and I'm opening this by myself
but I will also bring the kids in well
depending on what's in the box I don't
know what's all in the box yet so let's
see what's in the box and then we'll go
from there because like I said but
anything for like Oh Marvin
I will save those things and have them
open those as his birthday gifts so turn
your dreams into plans oh my god oh my
god oh my god oh my god thank you thank
you so it's turn your dreams into plans
and then what it is it's 20 sheets of
stickers all sorts of stickers look
my gosh all for my journal or my um my
oh I have this thing it goes with me
everywhere oh my god I'm so excited I'm
spinning I'm so excited oh my god Eileen
thank you so much it's God look at how
pretty these are oh my god
thank you so much
you are so I think what it is is there's
two of each sheet I'm believing that's
kind of what it looks like look at that
I don't want it to be blurry but they're
all stickers of just different things
like treat yourself we can stick or a
phone sticker organizing so it's two of
each that's amazing and then like party
stickers and movie night oh my god and
the cocktail ones yeah those are my
coffee that is like totally my coffee
one's a date night oh girl we need to
put that on the list I'm so excited to
use these oh this is so much fun in then
they've got like birthdays and holidays
Memorial Day Labor Day Black Friday oh
my gosh that is awesome
New Year's Martin Luther King Wow
they've got like April Fool's saying
they have every sticker you can imagine
that it's needed Christmas um Election
Day is awesome
oh and they even have like errands
cleaning time laundry time cooking time
grocery shopping let's do this urgent
stickers so here's the and then they
have flights huh would love to go on a
flight hahaha I know what that means
vacay packing oh wow this is the most
amazing set of planner stickers I have
ever seen
stickers for hair and spa day relaxing
day off I like that lazy day
hey we all need them right relaxing
Elain thank you so much this is just
like I love this this makes my heart so
happy
and then there's appointments big day
doctor appointments don't forget some
reminders taxes I like that one actually
we have our appointment on the 14th so I
could slap one of those stickers right
on their piggy bank bills due oh my god
[Applause]
I am so I'm I'm speechless at how many
stickers it comes with and whatever our
ID that is awesome I'm just
and again if you weren't aware of where
it's this it's called turn your dreams
into plans and then it's 20 pages of all
speakers thank you so much okay now the
next thing and these all come from
Elaine so Elaine
oh you make my heart so happy thank you
so much
I so appreciate everything that you've
got in our family if I could I would
have Olly in here he left the live to go
start the pizza for Omar's birthday
which I'll explain all of that here in a
minute but for sure I will make sure
that my family sees all of this and you
guys will see them as well on the video
so here's the next thing and what it is
it's a mobile phone see Omar and Ezra
they are so into this whole phone thing
and Omar yesterday I think it was he had
a phone like this like just a regular
phone cover
yeah don't talk about my thing I'm so
bad at that right now I gots to work on
that I've got to figure out what's going
on with my vinyl and sticking to phone
covers but anyways he was hello hello he
was talking to a phone cover so they're
gonna love to see this oh my god it
looks just like a real phone and it's
like got tons of stuff it's music and I
don't want to turn it on because I don't
want them to hear it
that is awesome oh my gosh and it lights
up that is too cool as touch screen so
it looks just like the iPhone which
they're gonna like that because I think
there are some Mama's groove they're
gonna think they're they're gonna see
that they are cool like mama oh my gosh
Elaine you have just made my heart skip
a beat like my babies are gonna
this so much thank you thank you thank
you from the bottom of my heart to the
top of my heart to the side to the side
oh my gosh there's still more goodies in
here Oh
oh my gosh oh my god oh my gosh look at
these My gods are so soft
look there's slippers and what I did is
I got him to wear is like dress shoes
because I got some a while back well
it's probably about a month and a half
ago not slippers but regular ones and
they hurt my feet so bad that I can't
wear them unless it's like a slipper
material because they rub my feet so raw
so I was like what can I do these are
going to be perfect for dress shoes I am
so in hell oh my god I am so excited oh
my goodness like this is that is awesome
thank you thank you thank you oh my gosh
and it keeps going up thank you I am so
excited thank you it was just another
part of the cards
oh my god oli is gonna be so excited
look at its his he has been wanting a
set of these pajamas and I don't know
where to get them so I seen this on
Amazon amok I think he might like this
he's kind of like this well it's funny
because I was growing through and I was
like oh honey and I was like what did I
say I brought it pajamas for some reason
and he was like oh yeah
he's like oh yeah and I you know I
didn't know it's called robes King
pajamas oh my god I cannot wait to show
you move but I met him put all this
stuff back and lets him open this stuff
on camera Elena Elena sorry I don't know
why I just said Ali well I had a friend
named Elaine actually Elena thank you so
much you are so amazing everybody every
one of you guys are so amazing dads out
there yelling at the kids thank you so
much
you all are so amazing every one of you
Jen thank you so much for the gifts for
Omar for his birthday I appreciate it so
much he is gonna absolutely adore
everything that you got him and the kids
are going to love the boys are gonna
love these blocks more than you can
imagine
and I think Esper's gonna take that
phone and just be like talking it up a
storm and my feet are gonna be singing
some straight-up choir in these things
because these are just amazing and the
stickers I couldn't have asked for a
better gift thank you so much I
appreciate it make me cry
it's just for the week the last couple
things that I've had today is just
turned out to be an amazing day amazing
day and I couldn't ask for a better day
because you guys have all made it so
possible from my wife to just everything
that I have been able to you know
Express and and talk about and stuff um
but you guys are just every one of you
guys are just so amazing I could not ask
for more amazing friends you know and
that's how I view you all our friends
you know and I know some have my back
more than others and hey we're okay with
that right right and hold on just a
second you guys you know I love my
husband so much but when he comes in and
touches my stuff that I can't find it
and then we become having issues but you
guys are just amazing
I could not thank you guys more for the
amazing people that you have all been to
me and you're not just people you're my
friends you guys have you know you have
been with me through so much that I
could not I honestly could not imagine
seeing my life any different way any
different way and I wouldn't want to see
any different way so for me it's like no
thanks I I'm happy I am so happy you
guys have made my life so happy so I
just want to thank you guys thank you
from the bottom of my heart
block that person person people are
psychotic pay no attention it sounds
like they are jealous probably someone
you knew trying to bring you down or
someone you probably know trying to
bring you down Ginny Ginny I agree with
you one hundred and twenty five thousand
percent
the sad part is I cannot block this
person because I can't get into my
youtube studio I don't know why but my
youtube channel is really not working
very well tonight it hasn't all days so
I'm only being able to get her my
comments by going through my mess and
through my video like I have to go to my
video to get to the comments I don't
know why but my thing's not working I
don't know what I've done but
something's not working so I cannot go
into my thing to block anybody and it's
frustrating me unless I can find a video
maybe that this person went on and
commented at one time maybe I could do
it that way I don't I'll have to play
with that Oh
anyways your children okay this is from
Michele Roper I'm just gonna keep it at
that because I don't want to say the
rest of it wrong your children are
adorable I wish we had those puddings in
the UK they look yummy oh my gosh girl
come on
these things are amazing but guess what
my kids have devoured them d BAU word
them seriously I buy them and they're
gone
umm keto momma okay I want to stop right
there right there so we have an amazing
woman that is on our Channel her name is
Kido mama I will put her stuff in this
description box or information and I'm
gonna put her name up here somewhere
well she is under keto mama she has an
amazing channel she is on a journey
herself for doing keto and like I had
stated a couple days ago I don't throw
shade at anybody for being on any
certain type of program
anything and everything works for every
individual differ that's why we're all
individuals so I support keto 120
million thousand percents because
she's an amazing woman she has a
wonderful channel and I absolutely adore
her please if you have not been over to
her channel before please jump over and
look at her channel and give her a try
and a chance and subscribe to her
because I would love loved love to see
her channel grow she deserves it
she is deserving everybody's deserving
but I really would like to see her
channel grow so if everybody can jump on
over and subscribe to Kido mama that
would be amazing
oh let's see sorry you guys is going to
sleep
anchors wait good for you stay away from
negativity there is only one crazy
person on YouTube saying she is going to
sue everyone it is an empty threat and I
would kindly suggest not even
communicating with her because she
doesn't love herself and fights with a
lot of people oh well as you all know I
do not proofread these so there you go
this person if it's the same person I
don't know because I have not talked to
synchro's way this person and I have no
idea of incres ways talking about the
same person we have not touched base or
talked about it but um if this person is
truly who this other person is then
there it shows you guys there's more
cycles alter than what we think too many
people have too much time on their hands
and my for niches okay creative chica
you are awesome thank you sometimes I
wonder if I really am because sometimes
I just don't feel it you know I
especially these last couple days were
pretty down for me but today I feel like
I've gotten more on I feel like I've
gotten more on track like I feel like
I'm I'm hitting little areas where I'm
starting to kind of be able to pick
myself back up so hopefully that just
continues because
you know I love being able to you know
see myself in a better light than I was
the last couple of days the last couple
days I was just a little bit down and
yesterday like I said it multiple times
so those were really hard day for me
since I started my journey and honestly
I I think that you know what really
stinks is that like days like yesterday
my my past of using food to cope
sometimes creeps up on me and like
yesterday I feel like I ate more than I
probably should have and that's a really
bad feeling you know it's a really I'm
just an unhealthy feeling for me and so
you know I just can't let those things
get to me because life is too short and
people aren't gonna in mind people
aren't gonna care if they're hurting you
or if they're gonna cause you to
backtrack like they're there waiting for
it to happen so for them it's like let's
sit back and eat our popcorn and watch
Amy disrupt herself and go back to
square one because that's where a lot of
people would like to see me go um but
then I've got so many amazing people
like all of you that are so encouraging
and so supportive that it's like I don't
want to go back to that and I would
never go back to it I'm drinking one of
my vitamin waters oh I'm like stuck on
these I feel like I swear there's
someone sitting outside my window if
you're out there say hello no watch it
says hello I would flip I you guys would
all be flying this one's the dragon
fruit oh so good um okay James done
who's ever James done sorry who's ever
doing this just wanted to let you know
that it is not me thank you James I
appreciate that
to know that it's not you um tah-dah
block them or let the message and email
you and just save them you can press
harassment charges against them again I
would block him if I could but I came
figure now because he can't get into my
stuff to do it cool but it's okay we'll
figure it out eventually and yeah you're
right I'm just I'm not even respond
after that last response all he was like
you know what you me do not respond back
to them no more
she said do not respond back so do not
respond back no more you have closed it
if she continues to then technically
she's going back on her word of advice
from her attorney which always like is
BS um cuz no attorney would even talk to
her about something like that because
there's nothing there I mean they might
have said well you can tell them not to
say anything or you can tell them you
know to not bring your name up in
conversation or in topic but like all he
said Amy you have not done anything
you've not said anybody's name you've
not nothing so he's like there's nothing
to go by the law is not gonna come after
you for something like that there is
absolutely nothing that they can do so
let her talk as much talk as she wants
let her act like she knows everything
and that's fine but you know Ollie said
the same thing as just you know don't
just don't email back anymore let it be
you know this person says my attorney
said not to bring my name up which we
never brought the name up I never have
spoken of the name I said one last email
that was it that severed I'm not gonna
reply back no matter how much this
person replies to me I'm not gonna reply
back and leave it at that but all he
said there is nothing to worry about
because no attorney and why we do it
that way is because this person's
attorney is err or literally does not
know their job all he said that
absolutely there is nothing to stand on
that would remotely even be a case so
he's like
don't even worry about it like totally
do not give two seconds of vision or
breath on it I'm like alright okay Diana
which she's under Sola to Chula but we
said that
Oh Amy bless your hearts I think you
have given that person too much
attention that is what they want I can
see it on your face just how down it's
gotten you and I wish I could reach out
and give you a big ol hug and tell you
it's gonna be get better just focus on
the good and brush off the bag you're
doing greatest on you're doing so great
on your weight loss one or two bad days
aren't going to erase it chin up doll
face me and a lot of people care about
you and you're stronger than this much
love and hugs thank you so much I
appreciate it and you're right you know
what you are right and you know what I
did have a couple a day is you know but
I think we all like you said do I think
we all have them it's just how much
you're going to allow those days to go
in two more days that's the trick but um
my lips my lips are so dry today
they really are dry today and I put
chapstick on too and didn't do much um
but uh anyways like tonight I'm gonna
have a little bit of cake with my son
why wouldn't I why wouldn't I enjoy
having a little bit of cake with him and
I'm gonna have pizza with him because
that says birthday it's a celebration
goodness but it's not like it's gonna be
something that I'm gonna have cake and
pizza every single night my god no I'm
not because that's just not the healthy
way of thinking about having that
relationship with that food but for
something that he requested that he
wants a his whole family to enjoy why
wouldn't I why wouldn't I embrace that
with him so of course I'm gonna talking
about that yes today is Omar's birthday
he is the big four-year-old you
Oh year-old so now I've got a 10-4 in
the two-year-old but my two-year-old is
gonna be three in a couple of weeks and
the my ten-year-old is gonna be 11 in a
few weeks up for that
so then anyways but you know it's just
he's such an amazing little boy that I
cannot believe four years have gone by
so quickly but we were gonna celebrate
it on Saturday and he was just adamant
about having his birth when I woke up I
sing him happy birthday so he knew today
was his birthday so he's like where's my
cake it's my birthday so me and all he
talked about and we oh my gosh what a
chaos of we had a call here called
they're trying to order a cake no one
had one so we ended up going to Costco
and just getting one and I have music
notes on it I'm like oh okay whatever
whatever floats his boat and then we
sing him happy birthday which I'll put
it in here we're gonna sing for
brother's birthday okay
happy birthday to you happy birthday -
oh my happy birthday to you Sena headway
Yaga means and ahead
yeah me Sanna hey Sanna hey me after
that let's see we we did not do gifts
with him because we were planning to we
were planning to go do his birthday
shopping tomorrow so he would have his
gifts on Saturday but since he insisted
that he wanted his birthday today we did
not have his gifts today so it's fine I
told Olli I think what I'm gonna do is
let Daddy take him on Saturday and just
go have a little bit of Sun and dad time
and um let him pick out a couple toys
with just daddy so I think that's what
I'm gonna do I really think that he will
appreciate that and I think that that's
something that would be fun and then he
wanted pizza for dinner and then he
wanted cake so that's his birthday we
don't do the big blowout birthdays
anymore just because you know we spent
so much money in the past on birthdays
and you know the thing is is that these
birthdays are for for the child for the
person for the person to be felt special
and I know that you know and I don't
shame anybody that throws big birthday
parties like don't get me wrong I you
know everybody's different I used to do
it
but as my kids as I've gotten more kids
first of all it's gotten more expensive
and two it's really true that you know
it's about the child it's not really
about us so what can we do to make that
child feel special is let them choose
what they want to do and he didn't want
to go out he we told him we're like you
wanna go to a restaurant you wanted to
stay home and have pizza he's out there
playing I could hear him running back
and forth screaming so he's having fun
that's all that matters um before I
forget let's do our storytime Oh
okay one more question because I or one
more comment I guess I should say Lee
Ripley girl I wish everyone could be oh
wait girl I wish everyone could go by
your attitude what a peaceful woman you
are that quote was great to hear I will
use that I will use that we'll try to
use that every day thanks for sharing
and happy birthday - Omar thank you so
much Lee and honestly I really am this
way all the time because I life is short
life is short and we can only do so much
in life so if we're a living life the
way that we always are just down and out
we're never going to enjoy lines but I
love life I just sometimes come up with
some hard people but learning to you
know learning to work with that and
around that I think is what makes such a
big difference so anyways yeah okay so
today's journal entry is the chapter of
your life that you keep editing out is
meant to be the headline of your success
stories stop pretending life let's start
that again sorry the chapter of your
life that you keep editing out is meant
to be the headline of your success story
stop pretending live your truth holy cow
Wow Wow like that's something the
chapter of your life that you keep
editing out is meant to be the headline
of your success story
stop pretending live your truth that
hits me right in the gut because you
know with everything that you know I've
been going through with trauma therapy
and stuff like that it's so true like I
have been trying to edit out that past
of my abuse and instead of editing out
and trying to erase it let that be my
headline for the way that my life was
and you know stop pretending that it
didn't happen but use that and live the
truth of where my life was and where it
is today that means so much truth to me
that is an amazing entry and I'm so glad
that was today's entry because I think
that hits me right where I really really
really really needed to hear that that
is amazing
this book is so good like I definitely
am gonna look for a guided journal faith
Brossart CAD I'm gonna look her up on
Amazon and see what other books she has
because honestly I think that these
books are something that definitely
definitely is something that I think
everybody can grow from reading those I
mean just it's like she every time I
read it it's everything that we're
talking about right now so it couldn't
be in a more perfect way so anyways
that's awesome well you guys I am gonna
close I have to go to the bathroom so
bad I think I have a UTI good times um
so I feel like I'm constantly pointed
bathroom and just won't stop um but I am
going to close and go get ready for
dinner with my fam fam and go snuggle up
with my birthday boy for a little bit
and I'm gonna place a little thing here
of just some pictures of him when he was
a baby
didn't today and then after that and it
will close so thank you guys so much for
joining me on my life or who was able to
make it who could make it totally cool I
am gonna start doing more lives I think
that it's something you know that I
enjoy doing and I just I love being able
to talk to people so thank you
definitely for everybody that was able
to join and the ones I couldn't totally
cool you'll catch the next one I bet and
I will check in with you guys tomorrow
bright and shiny in the morning until
then sweet dreams bye-bye
